Monkey Butt powder, highway pegs, man up, goldwing, boxer or briefs, stay home, state law requires you to tell wife?

 

Looks like you hit a chow and it got stuck to your seat...

 

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i just got back from a 3200 + mile ride and the only thing i used that really seemed to help was gold bond ultimate cream, i would like to get a mustang seat for my 05 ultra. but the tube of lotion did seem to help a lot

 

It's time to take it in the a@@ like a man!

*WARNING*

The following visual is intended for mature audiences only.

1. Lay on your back.
2. Swing legs up exposing, well, you know.
3. Turn your favorite brand of corn starch upside down and shake.
4. Ride on...

 

I picked up a sheepskin from Alaska Leathers. I was skeptical that it would make much of a difference; however, it did. Cooler and dryer now on those hot days. Plus, no more scorched bits after the bike has been sitting in the sun.

 

WoW you left this wide open! I'll refrain.

 

I do get a lot of looks with it! I call it my "PIMPHD" when I have the sheepskin on the seat. I'll live with the comments as long as my butt stays dry and the monkey butt stays away on these 100+ degree days!!

 

Well, I am going to add my experiences as well. About 5 years ago I was sitting in my doctors exam room. It was at the end of the day and I was the last patient. My doc is an older rider as well. He was asking me if I was going to ride up to Sturgis next month and I told him what with the heat and everything I just could not stand to ride for over an hour or two. He said "You get the Monkey butt"?
"Yes" I said. He laughed a little and said to try what he does, as he used to have the same problem.
"Go by the sporting goods store or Walmart and pick up a pair of spandex compression underwear or bicycle shorts". Then go to the diaper department at the drugstore and pick up a tube of ointment that has zinc oxide in the ingredients label. Rub the zinc oxide on your tea bags and *** cheeks. That cures about 97% of the problems" in babies and grown men" he said. I was kind of desperate so off to the local Walmart I go. Ten bucks for the spandex bicycle shorts and about four dollars for the tube of baby chap cream and I was out the door. I was kind of skeptical because I, like many here had tried everything in the book including spending hundreds on a new seat, all to no avail. The zinc oxide works and it costs a hell of a lot less than anything else I tried. Sometimes the easiest fixes are right in front of us and because we are looking for an expensive cure, we never try the cheap fixes.

 

Agreed - Warm in the winter and cool in the summer!

As far compression shorts, I can't see how all of that snug material could be comfortable, but to each his own. All I know is that the OL & I go commando (jeans & the sheepskin) and we've rode 8 hours in 90+ temps and neither of us have ever gotten monkey-butt.