Posers' Coffee House, All Bullshit Accepted, Part VI
Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Canada? (USA)
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Ca-na-da is that big country to your North… oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked.
Q: Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (England)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.
Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-ma-ny, which is... oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
Q: Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)
A: No, WE don't stink.
Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Where can I sell it in Canada? (USA)
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
Q: Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
A: Yes, gay nightclubs.
Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA)
A: Only at Thanksgiving.
Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is illegal.
Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada, but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. (USA)
A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.
Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Ca-na-da is that big country to your North… oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Calgary. Come naked.
Q: Which direction is North in Canada? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.
Q: Can I bring cutlery into Canada? (England)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.
Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-ma-ny, which is... oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Vancouver and in Calgary, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.
Q: Do you have perfume in Canada? (Germany)
A: No, WE don't stink.
Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Where can I sell it in Canada? (USA)
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.
Q: Can you tell me the regions in British Columbia where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
A: Yes, gay nightclubs.
Q: Do you celebrate Thanksgiving in Canada? (USA)
A: Only at Thanksgiving.
Q: Are there supermarkets in Toronto and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of Vegan hunter/gathers. Milk is illegal.
Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Canada, but I forget its name. It's a kind of big horse with horns. (USA)
A: It's called a Moose. They are tall and very violent, eating the brains of anyone walking close to them. You can scare them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.
Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you will have to learn it first.
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Frozelandia, Minnysota
Posts: 27,076
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Morning posers, both American and Canadian, back is screwed up but it could be worse, could be dead. Going to make for rough bowling tonight.
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Walker WV by way of NEW YORK CITY
Posts: 18,776
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36 Posts
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Walker WV by way of NEW YORK CITY
Posts: 18,776
Received 42 Likes
on
36 Posts
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Frozelandia, Minnysota
Posts: 27,076
Received 4,632 Likes
on
2,735 Posts
Found out about a year ago I can't bowl any more. Those damned bowling shoes are too slippery, strains my back too much just trying to stay on my feet.
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Frozelandia, Minnysota
Posts: 27,076
Received 4,632 Likes
on
2,735 Posts
Gawd, whadda day. Daughter rousted me outta bed to help her load her big moving truck, started with a storage room she'd rented. Started raining as soon as we got there, drizzled all day, still is. Her help never showed up. Everybody she knew was working. Finally called her ex in desperation, and he came. Probably the strongest man I know now, hate to think how it would have gone without him. Fine young man, wouldn't have hurt my feelings if she'd kept him.
I don,t like bowling to much, I pretty much stink at it.
I,ve never won a match in about 30 try's at various stages of my life...ever. I,ve maybe 5 strikes total.
Strikes, that's when you knock all the pins down, right?
I,ve never won a match in about 30 try's at various stages of my life...ever. I,ve maybe 5 strikes total.
Strikes, that's when you knock all the pins down, right?