At a car show I had this lady lean against my Camaro with jeans on and I lost my ****. I yelled across the parking lot "What the **** are you doing" LOL

 

Now you have the RIGHT answer!!!! You win. I can't beat that.

 

Some individuals are unaware of what the custom, etiquette or manners are with certain stuff.
I have found individuals both adults and children touching and sitting on my bike before.
When this has happened I have approached them politely when possible and offered to show the bike. I have even offered to take a picture of them with their spouse or child with their camera. I snap a few pictures and then i politely educated them regarding riding customs and being careful because sometimes other riders might get upset if they do not ask first or might even respond in a hostile manner. Then i hand them their camera back and tell them to have a nice day.
They have all seemed rather apologetic but at the same time thankful and departed on good terms. When not close enough to the bike i just say "careful you might get burned the motor is really really hot".
I figure most people will remember the experience and pass the information forward or at least remember that not all motorcyclist are pirates when showing their pictures to friends.
They sell a sun shade that attaches to the handlebars and covers the tank and seat if this is a constant problem for some. Even placement of just about anything on the seat will keep most people off. For overnight parking i suggest a light cover at minimum when at motels/hotels.

 

These type posts always bring out the internet tough guy posts, "If I were there I would have blah blah...."

It`s just a machine, if someone is trying to sit on it, politely tell them to leave it alone. No reason for start a confrontation, you never know who you may be dealing with.

 

Good approach. It's not the first to come to my mind but it will probably earn bikers a better reputation.

 

I would like to think I would respond the way IM responded.
But I really like the "Wave pistol screaming" "GET ON THE GROUND" response.
I guy at work sat on my brand new 883 2 weeks ago but I didn't see it another worker told me. I was a little miffed. But I know the guy is a friend and an experienced rider (that's no excuse for touching my stuff). I just wish he would have told me or asked first , I would have of course let him. I have yet to sit on or ask to sit on my soninlaws new roadking.
He's just to picky about such things.
Last week at a small Car show my wife touched a 65 Mustang convertible. I calmly but firmly said "MARY DON'T TOUCH" Her response was "Oh I'm sorry"
OK next time I'll have to pull out my pistol and scream "GET ON THE GROUND"

 

I always wondered about the lack of laws against this. After all they are violating private property.
Is anyone aware of any? I have zero hope for "Protect The Criminals" California, but others states?

 

Yeah, just what we need, more stupid laws.

What if a Police officer sees a Dirty Harry wannabee pull a pistol just because someone sat on his precious motorcycle?

The offense is sitting on a motorcycle, not attempted murder...

The bike is parked in a public place, people will touch it and sit on it. They will hit it with car doors and shopping carts...

 

You seem to have a rather lose, almost communist, view of the term "private property".

 

I think that may be the most bizarre post I have ever read.

I have an honorable discharge from the US Navy (1974-1979) on my wall, and I have worked in the defense industry for the past 31 years, so I`m pretty sure I`m not a Communist.

But I do have a dislike for stupid laws.