Seriously you cant be a REAL biker unless you have or do the following
1) A credit card to Kuyakyn
2) Whenever you ride you have to wear your holiest jeans and a Harley shirt and Harley boots.
3) The only hole you ever open on your bike is the gas tank
4) Your bike is covered in pretty little lights that change color
5) and probably most important YOU MUST WEAR A DOO-RAG.

 

I guess it does...guess we're all f*@kers too, LOL

 

Read every post in this silly thread. Some very clever.

They boil down to this: If you don't know you're a biker, you're not.

 

I must be bored today, because this is becoming mildly entertaining.

 

exactly...
I think several people have already said this(including me), but if you have to ask or are worried about what or who you are, you are not.

 

What authority out there determines what makes a "biker" and what does not make a "biker"?? There is none.... I can't believe this thread continues.

 

And a chicken farmer would be a "Cluckker"

Actually, when I really give this the thought it deserves.

I've been a "biker" since I was 5. Got my first 2 wheeler (sears) for that birthday.
So, Fu@#in A I am a BIKER.

 

Apparently half this forum is the authority...

 

Actually, it's me.

You need to submit documentation on your qualifications, a pic of your bike with list of "mods", and your creditcard info. I will test the validity of your creditcard by trying a few simple transactions....like a tab at the bar with my buds, give a cursory glance at the other crap I said to send, charge a one-time fee of $2400 (which I'll break up into 2 or 3 "easy payments") and mail you a patch that identifies you as someone who needs and has received official certification in the eyes of others of your self-imiage.

Don't ride anymore until you do this, because the "Bro's" have eyes everywhere. I mean it.

 

This makes the most sense of all, but there's various degrees of bikers.

Guys I know:
* One guy bought a new goldwing with heated seats, intercom, full blown stereo, loves to ride (2-up too) (but not when it's cold nor rainy).
* Another guy has an old rat metric dresser and has put 140k on it. Rides rain, sun, snow, day, night. Interestingly enough, does not own one piece of leather.

Who's a biker and who's not?