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Economic Stimulus Payment

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  #1  
Old 01-26-2009 | 04:11 PM
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Default Economic Stimulus Payment

Economic Stimulus Info.


"This year, taxpayers will receive an Economic Stimulus Payment. This is a very exciting new program that I will explain using the Q and A format:

Q. What is an Economic Stimulus Payment?
A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

Q. Where will the government get this money?
A. From taxpayers.

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?
A. Only a smidgen.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment?
A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?
A. Shut up.


Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the US economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:

If you spend that money at Wal-Mart, all the money will go to China.
If you spend it on gasoline it will go to the Arabs.
If you purchase a computer it will go to India.
If you purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala (unless you buy organic).
If you buy a car it will go to Japan.
If you purchase useless crap it will go to Taiwan.

And none of it will help the American economy.

We need to keep that money here in America. You can keep the money in America by spending it at yard sales, going to a baseball game, or spend it on prostitutes, beer and wine (domestic ONLY), or tattoos, since those are the only businesses still in the US.
 
  #2  
Old 01-26-2009 | 04:14 PM
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+1. hit it right on the head
 
  #3  
Old 01-26-2009 | 04:55 PM
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I never got mine in '08...WTF,,,they said I was supposed to
 
  #4  
Old 01-26-2009 | 06:21 PM
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I got exactly half of what they said I would get in 08.
 
  #5  
Old 01-26-2009 | 06:49 PM
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I thought they meant An "Erection Stimulas" I must have read it wrong?
 
  #6  
Old 01-26-2009 | 07:33 PM
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how am i going to spend a 500.00 tax credit on beer and hookers......
 
  #7  
Old 01-26-2009 | 07:35 PM
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I'll go to the motorcycle swap meet.
 
  #8  
Old 01-26-2009 | 07:39 PM
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Originally Posted by RDKingRider
I'll go to the motorcycle swap meet.
can you spend a tax credit there Hmmmmmmmmmmmm dont think so....
 
  #9  
Old 01-26-2009 | 10:47 PM
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The only thing I can see for the government to do that is worth borrowing money for is Nuclear power plants. THey can build them and than recoup the cost by selling the energy. It would create tons of jobs in construction and running them. Plus it would cause us to be less dependent on foreign oil.
 
  #10  
Old 01-27-2009 | 03:00 AM
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Originally Posted by ranger56528
how am i going to spend a 500.00 tax credit on beer and hookers......
cut out the hooker?
 



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