TOAK, The Thread of All Knowledge Part X
#5781
09-29-2017, 08:59 AM
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Southeast Michigan 15 Minutes East Of Hell
Posts: 149,078
Received 49,766 Likes
on
19,304 Posts
Hate that electrical stuff ... I'm no Thomas Edison :>(
The following users liked this post:
Backforty (09-29-2017)
#5782
09-29-2017, 09:03 AM
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Southeast Michigan 15 Minutes East Of Hell
Posts: 149,078
Received 49,766 Likes
on
19,304 Posts
In the great desert lived a band of nomads. Their leader, Benny, had risen to his rank due to his magnificent beard. His people believed a man's strength and courage came from his beard, and thus the man with the biggest beard was their chief.
After leading the band for many years, Benny began to fell uncomfortable wearing the beard, in this hot and dusty land. He wanted to shave it off, so he called his council together to get their advice.
When he said he wanted to shave, the councilmen were shocked. One said, "Do you not remember the ancient legend, Sire. The leader who removes his beard is cursed and made into a piece of earthenware."
Benny had heard this legend, but being a modern man, he scoffed at the tale.
Being headstrong, he went ahead and cut and scraped away his once magnificent beard. As the final whisker was cut off, a huge dust storm came up. It lasted only a few seconds, and when it cleared, there was a man-sized clay vessel where only moments before had stood their leader.
The council then knew the legend must be true. Their conclusion? "A Benny shaved is a Benny urned."
After leading the band for many years, Benny began to fell uncomfortable wearing the beard, in this hot and dusty land. He wanted to shave it off, so he called his council together to get their advice.
When he said he wanted to shave, the councilmen were shocked. One said, "Do you not remember the ancient legend, Sire. The leader who removes his beard is cursed and made into a piece of earthenware."
Benny had heard this legend, but being a modern man, he scoffed at the tale.
Being headstrong, he went ahead and cut and scraped away his once magnificent beard. As the final whisker was cut off, a huge dust storm came up. It lasted only a few seconds, and when it cleared, there was a man-sized clay vessel where only moments before had stood their leader.
The council then knew the legend must be true. Their conclusion? "A Benny shaved is a Benny urned."
Mel Famey was an erratic pitcher at best and was the last in the lineup for relief. Which meant that he was a great benchwarmer. Mel spent most of his time in the bullpen watching the game and imbibing beer on the sly.
One day, his team was up against the league's best, playing at home and in the bottom of the ninth with two out, the score tied, and two runners on. The last relief man had been hit by a line drive from the last hitter and had to retire from the mound. The manager had gone through every relief pitcher in the lineup and had only Mel left on his lineup card.
With an exasperated sigh the manager signaled for Mel to take the mound.
Mel made his way to the mound with only a hint of unsteadiness. He walked the first hitter. The crowd started to boo. Mel threw a strike, a ball, another ball. Then Mel seemed to settle down and took a long pause. He wound up and threw a perfect ball over the catcher's head. The winning run walked over the plate and the game was over.
On their way into the showers, the opposing team walked by the bullpen and noticed the empty beer cups stacked in the corner. One player remarked, "Well, that answers why we won. There's the beer that made Mel Famey walk us."
#5783
09-29-2017, 09:18 AM
Seasoned HDF Member
Mornin Mike, Larry and OG! I feel like some of those are reruns this morning but just think of it as brotherly love
#5784
09-29-2017, 10:08 AM
Seasoned HDF Member
Speaking of beer, I need one now. Three or four is better.
Researching solar panels. Last night some field guys were setting up a new well site and where hooking up the solar array to the battery box when all of a sudden things starting smoking. The "it never did that before" line then happened. So I need to find specks on what all happened.
Usual not my job but somebody needs to figure out wtf happened. Does not hurt that I am curious as hell what happened.
Researching solar panels. Last night some field guys were setting up a new well site and where hooking up the solar array to the battery box when all of a sudden things starting smoking. The "it never did that before" line then happened. So I need to find specks on what all happened.
Usual not my job but somebody needs to figure out wtf happened. Does not hurt that I am curious as hell what happened.
#5785
09-29-2017, 10:19 AM
Seasoned HDF Member
Dan, every one knows beer brings wisdom and insight. It even mad Bud wiser!
I'll see myself to the corner for a time out for that pun
I'll see myself to the corner for a time out for that pun
#5786
09-29-2017, 10:23 AM
Of Coors it does. Even made a couple of girls I know so smart they stopped taking it to the beach and they stopped getting sand in their Schlitz.
#5787
09-29-2017, 10:33 AM
Seasoned HDF Member
#5788
09-29-2017, 10:36 AM
#5789
09-29-2017, 10:39 AM
Seasoned HDF Member
#5790
09-29-2017, 10:40 AM
Morning all!
Great two days of fishing, bit windy, but Wednesday netted 14 fish, thursday 18.
Taking Ma to breakfast this morning, then unpacking and just relaxing today.
TGIF for those who work.
Al
Great two days of fishing, bit windy, but Wednesday netted 14 fish, thursday 18.
Taking Ma to breakfast this morning, then unpacking and just relaxing today.
TGIF for those who work.
Al