TOAK the Thread Of All Knowledge IX
#7271
06-08-2017, 08:44 AM
Club Member
#7272
06-08-2017, 08:44 AM
Seasoned HDF Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: TOAK Northern Branch
Posts: 34,574
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Tennis Elbow
One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really hurt. His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor.
''Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10." Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water. Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks."
Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message:
"Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better."
One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really hurt. His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor.
''Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10." Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water. Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks."
Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message:
"Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better."
#7273
06-08-2017, 08:45 AM
Extreme HDF Member
Morning woods. And woodette.
Called a local indy this morning, and looking at around $700 to replace stator. YIKES!!!!
I was keeping the bike because it wasn't costing me anything....
Called a local indy this morning, and looking at around $700 to replace stator. YIKES!!!!
I was keeping the bike because it wasn't costing me anything....
#7274
06-08-2017, 08:46 AM
Seasoned HDF Member
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: TOAK Northern Branch
Posts: 34,574
Received 2,087 Likes
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#7276
06-08-2017, 08:50 AM
Good one Larry!
Like I said, I'll go with the group on this one. I'm easy. I 'aint cheap, but I'm easy
Dude, you want to ride my Road King down? I don't have a sissy bar on it though..
Like I said, I'll go with the group on this one. I'm easy. I 'aint cheap, but I'm easy
Dude, you want to ride my Road King down? I don't have a sissy bar on it though..
#7278
06-08-2017, 08:54 AM
Moderator
#7279
06-08-2017, 08:54 AM
Extreme HDF Member
That would be my guess. Battery light and engine lights have been coming on for over a year but no one could diagnose it. So yesterday, battery died in parking lot (brand new battery) and needed to be jumped.
So I am speculating the charging system is shot and likely has been for quite some time, just as I said to the dealer a while back.
So I am speculating the charging system is shot and likely has been for quite some time, just as I said to the dealer a while back.
