Link to carrier and agent, Lou. That's an impressive premium.

 

I'm with Allstate, Mick.

 

Totally out of left field. I am watching the news. Ad comes on about erectile dysfunction. Guess I don't understand the problem. I had it years ago but it involved location, not duration. What did I miss?

 

Evening/afternoon all


Attending a Pentecostal Baptism in the Hills of KY


Some of you fellers might recall my telling you about my estranged relationship with my birth mother. If you don't, the short version is I was raised by my grandmother while my birth mother was pretty much putting it all out there, as it were.


Now understand I 'aint knocking folks fer their beliefs. It's a free country at least fer a little while longer


So anyway, like a lot of folks who have often not led the best of lives but can't really change what they are, my mother decided that she was going to join a church and get right with God. I've known several folks like this in my life and they are pretty much whole hog one way or the other. One minute they're cussin' and carrying on and the next they're a praisin' Jesus with every other breath and then back the other way...


So, she joined a Pentecostal Holiness church. I was in my late teens and still trying to connect with her on some level and so when she invited my to come to a baptism I said I would.


Now I was raised in a Southern Baptist church and while the preacher might get a little fired up and go to hollerin' and a thumpin' on the pulpit, the congregation 'aint to expressive in their worship services. The most you'd hear would be an affirming "Amen!" every once in a while.


The Holiness folks are a bit more expressive in their worship, but that's another story I can tell you later.


So I show up for the baptism which is being held at the swimmin' hole right beside the bridge on Station Camp Creek. Now these folk don't hold with baptizing in no indoor church bath tubs and they dang sure don't believe in sprinkling, so it's the creek or the river 'cause that there is God's own water.


There's a group of about 12 or 15 already there when I show up and the preacher is a givin' 'em a warm up talk right there on the bank of the creek. Finally it's time to get it done and the candidate for eternal life steps forward.


She's about 5' foot tall and dang near as wide going, I'd say, a good 250 pounds. The preacher steps down into the creek, which is close to 6' deep if ya was to go out into the deepest part. I should mention at this point that the preacher himself was not a large man at all and as thin as a scarecrow.


He smiles and waves to his prospective new member to join him in the water. I could tell she was a little nervous (I found out later she couldn't swim a lick), but went willingly nonetheless. He took a couple white handkerchiefs and folding them both in half formed them in the shape of a cross, placed it over her face and placing his hand in the middle of her back began lowering her backwards into the water.


Now right here is where things started going badly for him..


(more to come)

 

did the meds keep you erect for 4 hours?

 

Tracy, I am waiting the exciting conclusion. At this point I see Don Knotts tryin' to Baptize Totie Fields.

 

k

 

Hi, Helen. First, that 4 hour thing has to be a blatant lie. Secondly, my problem was with where that little feller was aimed, not how long it took to line up my sights.

 

hi mick ..gentlemen..my bad mick..after i read it again i saw that but it was too late..i was just being a smart *** sorry

 

Helen, you should never say sorry. Excuse me, my faux paus or damn, just how stupid were you works.