I100% understand! I also have a wife, but what i did was i had stuff installed at dealer before picking it up and told her it was stock with all that chrome and paint and bars!
That was a great idea! Unfortunately, my wife was with me when I bought my bike, so I wouldn't have been able to pull that off.
Can't you loosten your riser clamps and roll the bars back a little?
That might make your position a little more comfortable.
When I first picked up the bike, the bars followed the line of my forks. I rode home, which is about 15 minutes from the shop, and my wrists were hurting. The reason is because of the angle of the bars. There really isn't any pullback on the bars. They're designed to be positioned straight up. If the bars are pulled back any, the ends of the grips start to point forward. That causes the wrists to be positioned awkwardly and you can't really grab the grips right. First thing I did when I got home with the bike was push the bars forward. Now I don't have any issues with my wrists. I just have to lean forward a little to reach the bars.
IMO the dealershould have sized you up and recommended something that suits your reach.
I wanted the bars because they're not a style you see on every bike. Softail Customs are everywhere. Especially black Softail Customs. So I wanted to make mine stand out from the crowd. I can't fault the dealer for that. The bars were my decision. And I gotta say... the bars really do make it stand out from the rest. They turn heads everywhere I go.
I100% understand! I also have a wife, but what i did was i had stuff installed at dealer before picking it up and told her it was stock with all that chrome and paint and bars!
In our house, that's called a "tune-up." Bike always needs a tune-up...