Now this is getting rediculous!
#82
12-25-2011, 10:49 AM
All right already.......this post is driving me nuts. LOOK. There's been some good advice, and some wise cracking as usual, but I'm gonna draw the bottom line.....
If you do nothing, your a gone-er. This mess will not get better, or go away. Hiding in the garage and working on your bike is a fine way to cope if your willing to live the rest of your life in denial. I'll even admit to you it's better then murder and life behind bars. BUT dude, it's not going to fix your mess.
What you need is have a big meeting, formulate a very specific plan, one that has rock solid time frame elements, and form a understanding with all parties....the plans goal being, Jr moving out.
Hell write out a contract and all three of you guys sign the damn thing. After all's understood and perfectly clear....work toward the desired ending........
This will get the ball rolling, you'll be able to check of benchmarks as they pass, and then when the allotted time has passed.....the monkey will be all on jr's back, if he's failed to find that job, save that money, or what ever was agreed upon.
He's gone, you and the mrs have done your best and there it is.
The longest journey begins with the first step........MAKE THE FIRST STEP.
If you do nothing, your a gone-er. This mess will not get better, or go away. Hiding in the garage and working on your bike is a fine way to cope if your willing to live the rest of your life in denial. I'll even admit to you it's better then murder and life behind bars. BUT dude, it's not going to fix your mess.
What you need is have a big meeting, formulate a very specific plan, one that has rock solid time frame elements, and form a understanding with all parties....the plans goal being, Jr moving out.
Hell write out a contract and all three of you guys sign the damn thing. After all's understood and perfectly clear....work toward the desired ending........
This will get the ball rolling, you'll be able to check of benchmarks as they pass, and then when the allotted time has passed.....the monkey will be all on jr's back, if he's failed to find that job, save that money, or what ever was agreed upon.
He's gone, you and the mrs have done your best and there it is.
The longest journey begins with the first step........MAKE THE FIRST STEP.
#83
12-26-2011, 03:45 AM
Road Captain
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Toledo Bend Lake Texas
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There's enough oilfield jobs in Wyo. that any one who wants a job can get one!
I feel, his mom may be as much a part of the problem as he is. Hiding in the garage and not facing the problem, will not make it go away!
As another poster said: Set objectives, set a reasonable time frame, come out of the garage and help him meet the objectives and time frames. It's going to take effort from all parties involved.
Ignoring it will only make the problem and your stepson "Bigger"!
From your discription of his birth father I'd say the nut didn't fall far from the tree.
If you don't face up to him and his mother, I think your going to have a life of "supporting" the little "darling" !
Don't feel like "the Lone Ranger", this is a problem that many families experience! Split families make the problem more troublesome, either, Deal with it or Learn to live with it!
I feel, his mom may be as much a part of the problem as he is. Hiding in the garage and not facing the problem, will not make it go away!
As another poster said: Set objectives, set a reasonable time frame, come out of the garage and help him meet the objectives and time frames. It's going to take effort from all parties involved.
Ignoring it will only make the problem and your stepson "Bigger"!
From your discription of his birth father I'd say the nut didn't fall far from the tree.
If you don't face up to him and his mother, I think your going to have a life of "supporting" the little "darling" !
Don't feel like "the Lone Ranger", this is a problem that many families experience! Split families make the problem more troublesome, either, Deal with it or Learn to live with it!
#84
12-26-2011, 11:08 AM
Club Member
There's enough oilfield jobs in Wyo. that any one who wants a job can get one!
I feel, his mom may be as much a part of the problem as he is. Hiding in the garage and not facing the problem, will not make it go away!
As another poster said: Set objectives, set a reasonable time frame, come out of the garage and help him meet the objectives and time frames. It's going to take effort from all parties involved.
Ignoring it will only make the problem and your stepson "Bigger"!
From your discription of his birth father I'd say the nut didn't fall far from the tree.
If you don't face up to him and his mother, I think your going to have a life of "supporting" the little "darling" !
Don't feel like "the Lone Ranger", this is a problem that many families experience! Split families make the problem more troublesome, either, Deal with it or Learn to live with it!
I feel, his mom may be as much a part of the problem as he is. Hiding in the garage and not facing the problem, will not make it go away!
As another poster said: Set objectives, set a reasonable time frame, come out of the garage and help him meet the objectives and time frames. It's going to take effort from all parties involved.
Ignoring it will only make the problem and your stepson "Bigger"!
From your discription of his birth father I'd say the nut didn't fall far from the tree.
If you don't face up to him and his mother, I think your going to have a life of "supporting" the little "darling" !
Don't feel like "the Lone Ranger", this is a problem that many families experience! Split families make the problem more troublesome, either, Deal with it or Learn to live with it!
Not knocking but the big oil boom up there has gone exactly like the Alaskan pipeline jobs did bs there are but the local infrastructure has gone apeshit with prices on everything it's even running lifetime locals out it's so bad .
Sorry about the jack , private bitch of mine when those so called dream jobs pop up .
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