Originally Posted by RDFXDF

I guess I'm lucky, while searching for a bike I was dead set on either a Big Dog Pitbull or a Victory Hammer S. Had seen a Fat Bob while at the dealer with my father in law who was there shopping for stuff for his 08 Cross Bones and sent a text w/pic to my lady telling her I really liked the looks of this Fat Bob.

One week later she has me stop at a different HD dealer and goes inside (for what I thought was getting some stuff for her Dad) 30 minutes later she said you may wanna get out and test ride your new ride to make sure you like it. I looked back over my shoulder and sure as $hit they are rolling out a brand new Fat Bob. Long story short I'm a very very lucky man.

I realize I have been no help at all, just wanted to share.

Originally Posted by TwiZted Biker

You have a good woman , treat her well my friend . Nice to have a life with out the typical drama involved isn't it .


Sorry about the side track off subject I'm going to be crude here Lawyers = ***** tax , the drama queens are going to have their 15 min. of fame one way or the other .
Anybody ever notice that in countries having legal prostitution divorce rates are LOWER than in countries that don't , food for thought both sides of the fence .

The OP is in the middle of a subconscious " test " how he handles it getting the bike or not will determine the tone of their relationship from now on , we all go through this . Strip away all the reasoning and excuses on the subconscious level this is how the dominate personality in a relationship sets the boundaries in a nut shell , control .

Originally Posted by bikergirl40

You didn't answer my question, Mr Biker ... It is obvious a bike would be more important than your wife... Sooooo, Would a bike be more important to you than your child? Where are your boundaries?

Originally Posted by dtMelissa

<.< and friends wonder why I hesitate on going out on dates with guys...
lighten up on the hatometer would ya? It's supposed to be a topic of ideas (fun inginuative, both or.. not hate spam etc, think we could all use less of that these days)

OP should run!! xD no seriously, there's a lot of good advice in here. Take it all for what's it's worth and gl!

Originally Posted by TwiZted Biker

No hater here honey I do love my women , get to our age and still be single you are wary with good reason . 90% of what I said was explained to me by a woman a relationship counselor actually I'm just passing it along and the lawyer comment is just an observation ,

Originally Posted by bikergirl40

I don't know if I would totally agree that wives and girlfriends are worlds apart .. Girls are girls, true, but each are different in profound ways. Their personalities don't change the moment girlfriends become wives. I do have to admit, people change with their environment to a certain extent. When someone is in a happy and positive situation, their outward personality may be positively affected. When they are unhappy .. the affects are adverse.

There are, however, personality 'types' ... don't forget those do not define women in general terms by any means. The commitment itself, on the other hand may be somewhat questionable with a girlfriend/boyfriend relationship. Not all are full time and fully committed. THAT is where they differ.

Putting 'your foot down' ... is not as easy as you'd like it to seem...though, now is it. When you first get together, you probably take some time to get to know each other.. or at least, one would hope you do. Hopefully, you both should have some idea how the other works, what each of your inspirations are, what your dreams are ... and your ability to make it come to reality.

If you for instance, both agree that you will delve into a mortgage, and start rearing some young'ns, financially, you are probably pretty strapped. You both, as partners, need to do what is necessary to keep the fire burning and the engine oiled (so to speak) .... then ... The family car needs repairs, the roof leaks, the kids are sick .. you name it, as a couple you expect your 'better half' to do her part in helping to keep that 'finely tuned machine' from breaking down.

When, she sacrifices as much as you do, why then, do you think, that she should expect any less from you? You can never forget what you are asking her to even further sacrifice so you can have your toy. If, in fact, she is the one expected to sacrifice even more than she already is...why are you so surprised that she speaks up. You can't fault her for that. IF and only IF that is the case. Problem is, it's not always as clear cut as that.

If your spouse decides she can't live with you without controlling everything (house, home and all occupants) .. that is one problem .. That is a control issue. If, on the other hand, she balks at your idea to spend money that could be used to fix the roof and the car and buy your children their medication, you can't be surprised. It's called 'priorities', gentlemen .. There has to be an agreement about the order in which they fall. There has to be a balance of practicality and frivolous reward.

Compare apples to apples ... Men can be controlling just as much as women can be .. To the point of being abusive. Do not confuse genuine concern with control issues. Do not paint everyone with the same brush.