In my younger days, got caught driving the wrong way on a one-way...I lived there on that street, it was 3 AM, didn't feel like driving 5 blocks around, and no one was around or so I thought.....NYPD happened to be sitting on the other corner....told the officer when he pointed out I was going the wrong way..."sign says one way and I was only going one way officer"....he laughed handed me back my license...

Today I'd prob get tasered!! LOL

 

The funniest one I ever heard was in traffic court and some idiot was trying to convince the judge to dismiss his ticket. He was ticketed for driving 60 MPH in a residential area during a snow storm. He told the judge "My wipers were broke and I was trying to blow the snow off my windshield." The judge busted out laughing and assessed a pretty hefty fine.

 

My "I Support Pay Raises for Police" bumper sticker usually works

 

Brother and I were in downtown Indy on a Sat. night. Both of us nailed it under a nice long railroad bridge. Turned the corner, there's Johnny Law. We rolled by JL at 30mph in 4th gear, quite as possible. JL pulls us over. JL says "that couldn't have been you boys making all of that noise could it"? We said "no sir, we were just on our way to church". JL laughed and said "get out of here". Get out of there we did.

 

wana see me naked?

 

Cop pulls me over and says "You were going 100 MPH!!" I said ... "That's because I had to slow down for the corner."

OK NOT a true story but "I" thought it was funny!

 

I had to pee!

 

Actually I keep my retired military ID card right behind my drivers license. I always pull them out together and hand them to the LEO. That has got me out of many many tickets.

 

I usually get a ticket so I just save time and say, "I was trying to beat your fat a** to the donut shop!"

 

Every time i have been pulled over and handed the police my drivers license insurance card registraiton AND my concealed pistol permit ..i get a warning.... every other time with just my drivers license and regigstratin and insurance papers and no permit i get a ticket.... go figure