Top 4 Ugliest Harley Davidsons (& 3 ‘Dis’Honorable Mentions)
Sometimes, beauty is in the ‘eye of the inebriated.’
There are some ugly motorcycles in this world. Motorcycles so ugly they will stop you dead in your tracks and pray for forgiveness for whoever is riding them.
Most of them are not Harley Davidsons. However, with the Motor Company’s long and illustrious history, there are bound to be some monstrosities that roll off its hallowed assembly lines.
Only a strong drink can make these bikes look good. Sometimes beauty is in the eye of the inebriated.
Here then, in no particular order, is my “extremely subjective” list of just seven of the pug-ugliest Hogs. Apologies in advance if your bike is on this list, but be aware I have arranged for extra security.
1. 2014 CVO Deluxe
I actually like the paint job on this bike, as well as the 2015 version. But, that’s where it ends. HD designers tried to turn this nostalgic beauty into a semi-touring bike and just threw the kitchen sink at it.
For example, the laced wheels on the Deluxe were always part of its charm. Well, they changed that out to an ugly “wagon” wheel that even well-known sales manager of the Los Angeles Harley dealership Matt Laidlaw hates.
“They decided to throw just a bunch of random accessories on it that don’t even go with the Deluxe styling or appeal at all.” says Laidlaw, who I don’t usually agree with, in this video. “We got very few of these bikes and it was a feat of masterful salesmanship or just a luck of the draw that you got someone who walked in the door who was remotely interested in it…Most people just forgot about this model and don’t talk about it.”
2. 2023 Street Bob
The 2023 “Industrial Yellow” Street Bob. The Street Bob, both when it was a Dyna and now that it’s an M8 softail, is one of the best looking motorcycles HD makes, in my opinion.
But NOT when it’s painted this ungodly, upchuck-yellow. Ug. The poor FXBBS looks embarrassed to be this color. It looks like it’s trying to hide. Yellow should get nowhere near a motorcycle, much less a fine little scoot like the Street Bob.
Imagine having one of these and having to stare down at that yellow tank, making you a nauseous menace on the road. It’s like making Arnold Schwarzenegger wear a dress.
4. Sportster S
The Sportster S. The Motor Company began making the sportster in 1957, but in 2021 they claimed to have seen the future and came up with this abomination.
Now, before you S owners start foaming at the mouth, I realize it is a great-performing bike with 121 horsepower and 94 ft/lbs of torque. But couldn’t they have at least given a nod to the historic design of this revered motorcycle so many of us have loved for so long?
Look at those fat, ugly sportbike upswept pipes. That chopped, good-for-nothing rear fender. That Revolution Max engine with those three big dog bowls messing up the whole right side.
If they can ever get all that technology into a small bike that even resembles a Harley Davidson I’ll be the first to buy it. Ditto the Nightster.
Dishonorable Mention
The “Envious Green Fade” paint job on the 2022 Street Glide should be called the “Hideous Snot-Green Camo.”
The now defunct Street 500 and 750 were generic Hondas with not an ounce of Harley character.
The 2009 Tri Glide Ultra Classic. Why not just buy a city bus?
The Electra Glide Highway King. I love the idea of modern technology in a nostalgic framework, but please ditch the white saddlebags. Everything was not great in the 1960s: Remember “My Mother the Car?”
Photos: Harley Davidson
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